If you ask anyone who knows me whether I am an introvert or extrovert, the majority would firmly place me in the extrovert camp.
From the outside, I am a self-assured, outspoken person who can stand up in front of groups of hundreds of people and speak confidently, whether at a wedding as a celebrant or a work-related conference.
I enjoy public speaking – provided I’m familiar with the topic I’m discussing – and this outward confidence gives off a smokescreen, protecting what’s really behind it all.
You see, after such events that draw on all of my energy, I often find myself slinking home and going in to a zone where I don’t want to talk or be talked to.
My battery is empty, I am empty, and the only way I recharge is by having alone time.
Being around other people is a completely draining experience for me.
Small groups I can handle much better, and while in some situations I may come across as the life of the party, on the inside I am planning my escape, watching the time to ascertain when would be an acceptable moment to make my getaway.
Engaging in small talk bores me, especially when the other party offers up insincere questions that I can see straight through, and while I’m happy to hold fort as the centre of attention while I tell a yarn, I’d prefer the attention moves to someone else when I’m done.
Don’t even get me started on what happens when someone I barely know recognises me from this column in real life. Most times I wish for the ground to open up and swallow me whole rather than begin a conversation on that type of uneven ground, where people think they know me and I know nothing about them.
Whenever I completed those Myers Briggs personality tests, I always came up borderline introvert/extrovert and it was confusing to me that someone could be a bit of both, considering the definition of the two were so black and white.
Then, thanks to the magic of the internet, I came across the term “ambivert” one day and it was like a light went off.
An ambivert is defined as a person who has a balance of introvert and extrovert features.
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